Eliminating The Good The Bad & The Ugly Part 1

Have you ever been so overwhelmed that it absolutely crushes you? It pretty much paralyzes you? You don’t know where to begin?…how to get started?…. You start over analyzing things (because you are paralyzed). You’re looking at the huge mess in front of you be it actual stuff, paperwork, things you have to do before a major deadline, etc. Then you begin that spiral backwards…”I can’t do this!”

I always remember a saying I heard first from my boss when I first started in Corporate America. “ How do you eat an Elephant?”….”One bite at a time!”

That’s how it was for me when John and I started on this journey years ago about downsizing and simplifying our lives. It takes time and patience (Thank you John for having patience with me) Because it isn’t always easy letting things go.

When eliminating clutter and “stuff” from your lives you need to break it down somehow. When we started this journey back in 2010, we did a great job of downsizing our large home to a wonderful 900 sq ft. cute as hell house. We were enjoying a much smaller space and truly enjoying the benefits that comes with it. It’s funny though…how life seems to throw you curve balls every now and then. I know it’s to make sure we are paying attention

Our “curve balls” involved the passing of my Dad then Mom and John’s Dad. When our father’s passed away. John went through and began accumulating items from his Dad. Pictures, dish ware, paintings, iron objects and tools, lot’s of tools.

When my Dad passed, mom was still with us and yet I received many of the items I always desired growing up. A grandfather clock, cowboy belts, a badge and a couple of paintings. I had my two older brothers who received the bulk of his small estate but that is to be expected since they are the boys.

Fast forward 7 years, my mom sadly leaves us unexpectedly and now going through the rest of our parent’s worldly possessions. There is so much! How can I give some of this stuff away? I grew up with this all around me. We all felt the same way.

We sat at our dinning table. The dinning table we enjoyed many holiday meals together. Along with the “million dollar buffet” (my mom re-did the buffet and it came out so pretty she renamed it that) along with all the other “stuff’ accumulated over the years. Looking around there was a lot to do. I was quick to think and organize a plan to get through all this and clean out the house while I was in town for the week.

Enjoying some laughs and good times we set to our task. Super easy going through much of the throw away. We had no problem with items that we felt no attachment to. From linen to certain clothing items, it was easy to put in the “donate pile”. It goes the same for the “trash it” pile too. Items that mom planned on repairing someday or collections of hooks, buttons or plastic tupperware were easily tossed.

The deeper we cleared out the closer we all got to the more personal items. Paintings that hung on the wall, art of all sort, fine dishes and utensils and of course the furniture.

My parents had the coolest (and longest) couch I have ever seen. Wth a slight curve to it. The good news? It was all in one piece. The bad news? It was all in one piece. I loved that couch and so did my mom. So much so that it saw several re-upholstered fabrics in its day. All in shades of white and off-white. It was a cool couch. How could I give that away????!!!! My brothers didn't have the room for it. So I made room. I took it back with me and I had it re-upholstered in leather verses fabric. A cool shade of avocado! Yes….avocado green! Don’t snicker…it was pretty.

So for the next several years that couch came with us. Any place we were looking to move that couch had to fit. If we had stairs? Too bad… the couch is coming. If the space is too tight in the living room? Then we were not going to move there. The couch was super heavy too. Since it didn’t break into two pieces it was 120 inches long and top heavy when you picked it up. No fun maneuvering through the front door and winding around to the living area.

I loved that couch and I had an emotional attachment to that couch. For me, giving that couch away was like giving a part of my family away. How could I do that?!!!! I want to live small but that couch had to come with us. John didn’t see it the same way. He also didn’t have the emotional attachment to it like I did. He also was the one who would move that couch from time to time and it was no fun. However, he was sensitive to my very emotional state whenever we discussed eliminating items and one of those items was a 120 inch-in one piece-heavy as hell couch!

So what did I do?…..

In our next blog, I’ll explain and also give you some key things to think about if/when you decide to downsize and simplify your life.

Shawn